Global 2011: 10 things I don't want to hear my husband say

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What I don't want to hear from you, my darling husband ...

1. Details of how successful or unsuccessful your trip to the bathroom was.

2. That you didn't like the dinner I slaved over all day long.

3. How annoying you find the kids, three seconds after walking in the door.

4. The dirty joke you heard at work.

5. That there are no clean socks.

6. That you think I look fat.

7. That I haven't changed in two and a half days.

8. That your head hurts and your throat tickles and you are really sleepy.

9. That you're in the mood.

10. That you managed to wrangle all of the kids out of the house, to the museum, out to lunch and to the bathroom with no minor catastrophes.

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