Wednesday, August 31, 2011

Global 2011: How to ask a guy out

Cropped image of Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes. ...Image via Wikipedia
There’s no easy way to phrase this without provoking a barrage of “What are you, crazy?” emails, but here’s my theory: By the time she hits 20, even the shyest, mousiest, most un-Katie-Holmes like woman has developed at least a rudimentary strategy for fending off (or responding to) unsolicited come-ons by eager guys. But unless a guy happens to look like Viggo Mortensen, he can persist well into his 40s without once having been — flatly, out of the blue — asked out on a date. (After that, the odds tend to shift, as those handsome, hard-driving captain-of-industry types die off or get married, resulting in a surplus of on-the-prowl single women. Have I offended anyone yet?)

Anyway, whatever the explanation, the fact is that single women are more accustomed to being asked out, and single guys are more accustomed to doing the asking — which means there’s not a lot of data out there about how men like to be approached for a first date. With an eye toward correcting this imbalance, here are my observations about the best way to hit on a guy, whether it’s someone you work with, someone you’ve met online, or someone you’ve just rear-ended at a busy intersection.

  • Be direct.
  • Be indirect.
  • Come up with a plan.
  • Don’t come on too strong.
  • Don’t over-plan.

Enhanced by Zemanta

Monday, August 22, 2011

Manila 2011: 5 Body Language Clues He Definitely Likes You

Body LanguageImage by Monyokararan. via Flickr
No matter where you've met that great guy -- at a friend's party, a bar or even a blind date -- there's the million-dollar question you are dying to find out: Does he like me, or not? What if you could know for sure? His body language could be a dead giveaway.

Sign #1:
He flashes his brows and smiles when he sees you
Raised brows signal attraction: It's the universal sign of interest and it exists in every culture. In fact, some experts think it's the most recognized non-verbal sign of greeting used by humans. When we're attracted to someone, our eyebrows rise and fall subconsciously. And when the other person is similarly attracted, they raise their brows and smile in return. The whole exchange lasts less than a second, though, so it can be easy to miss unless you're looking out for it!

Sign #2:
He points his body towards you
If he's across the room, take a peek at his hands and feet: We tend to point toward the object of our desire subsciously. When we find someone attractive, we'll often point (with our hands, feet or toes) toward that person.

If you're engaging in a conversation with him sitting next to you, it's even easier to tell: If he leans slightly forward and keeps his shoulders and upper body squarely facing you, it shows that he's deeply interested in you and what you have to say.

Sign #3:
He gazes at your lips while you're talking
Our eyes have a body language all their own. A major telltale sign of how we feel about someone is our gazing pattern: When we look at acquaintances, like at business meetings, we keep our gazes at eye-level, focusing on the other person's eyes and the bridge of the nose.

With friends or someone we like, we hold our eye contact longer than usual and our gaze moves down to include the nose and mouth. And if he's romantically drawn to you, the look can further drop down to include parts of your body like the neck or shoulders. This type of intimate gaze conveys interest. It's as if he can't resist caressing the rest of your face and hair with his eyes, or he's imagining what it feels like to kiss you on the lips.

Sign #4:
His pupils widen and he blinks more when looking at you
The size of our pupils adjusts according to two things: Light and attraction. It's a biological reaction we cannot control. Secretly compare his pupils and another person's (like your girlfriend if she's sitting beside you) in the same surroundings. If we're looking at a person we like, our pupils will dilate, so will our blink rate. The reason: When we're excited, our body releases more adrenaline which results in dilated pupils and faster blinks -- the same physiological process that makes our heart pump faster and our knees weak!

Sign #5:
He laughs at just about everything you say
If his eyebrows remain slightly raised while you're talking, it signals that he finds you fascinating. Another obvious sign that he likes you a lot: He nods, smiles, laughs and agrees with just about everything you say, including the silly stuff. He's not just being cordial -- he's genuinely happy to be with you!

Enhanced by Zemanta

Tuesday, August 16, 2011

Manila 2011: What Men Find Sexy In Women

Woman with a "censorship costume" du...Image via WikipediaMen instinctively know a sexy woman when they see one, but what is it about a hot woman that oozes allure? These experts tell all about what's sexy to the male brain.

1. Dress
If you ask a man to pick out the sexiest dress on the rack, he'd probably reach for the skimpiest of the lot. Well, technically, he's right. But every woman wears a dress differently, and what looks sultry on someone else may not work well for you, or vice versa.

2. Lingerie
It's a scientific fact that men are visual creatures, says April Masini, author of Think & Date Like A Man, and one way to appeal to their visual side is lingerie.

3. Confidence
The thing that men (and women) find sexiest about the opposite gender is confidence, according to Shelly Hagen, author of The Everything Body Language Book. And this confident quality has nothing to do with beauty or looks.

4. Hair
A woman's hair is one of the sexiest female assets from a male perspective. And it doesn't matter whether you wear it straight or wavy, casually tousled or perfectly blown-dry -- men love your hair, and they love it long. "Socially, your hair is a cue that tells men about who you are," explains April Masini, author of Think & Date Like A Man.

5. High heels
Men's attraction to stiletto heels is undeniable, but heels are more about what a woman looks like in them than about the shoes themselves.

Enhanced by Zemanta

Thursday, August 11, 2011

Manila 2011: Flirting Body Language Clues That Say You're Interested

A study in body language.Image via Wikipedia
You've spotted that guy whom you find particularly attractive, someone you're interested in. And right now, what you want is the opportunity to get to know him, spend some time together, and determine whether he is really right for you. It's time to turn on the charm: Follow these nonverbal flirtatious moves and put them to good use!

Eye contact
It's been said that eyes are the windows to the soul. If you think about it, there are so many things your eyes can communicate to your partner – whether it's your spirit or your intent – without even saying a word. When two people first lay eyes on each other, they can instantly send and receive messages from the contact: Shy glances, cool assessment or even sexual interest. And when you gaze deeply into a guy's eye, you're actually transmitting the signal that you think he's the most fascinating person in the room.

Smiling is one of the most dynamic forms of body talk. When you smile at someone sincerely, you're telling the person that you're enjoying the time you are spending together. If he's interested in you, your smile also works to resassure him that he's done all the right things to leave a good impression!

Leaning toward him
Have you talked to someone and noticed the person leaning forward in his chair, and you felt like the person was really excited about what you had to say? That's because this forward-leaning gesture physically conveys interest and acceptance, say body language experts.

It's not just a human trait: Many animals, too, exhibit preening behavior in the presence of prospective mates in order to make themselves more attractive.

Mirroring his actions
Imitation is the sincerest form of flattery. And mirroring, which simply means mimicking the other person's movements and gestures, is a big sign of attraction. When you alter your body language to mirror someone, such as leaning forward when he does, or raising your glass when he takes a sip from his drink, you're subconsciously trying to build rapport with him. It's amazing how quickly people respond to behavior that mimics their own.

Enhanced by Zemanta

Wednesday, August 3, 2011

Global 2011: 5 little-known ways to flirt

PARIS, FRANCE - MARCH 17:  A chocolate tasting...Image by Getty Images via @daylife
When it comes to attraction, there may indeed be a little weird science involved. Seriously, how many times have you looked at a couple and said to yourself, Hmmm…how did a guy like that get a gal like her? Well, we’re not going to say we’ve found the magic elixir, but we did dig up some surprising secret ways men can effortlessly make themselves more attractive to the ladies.

We’re guessing that even if they don’t actually work for you personally, the extra confidence you’ll exude knowing you’ve got these stealth attraction tactics (i.e., “attractics”) in your arsenal may just help you land a date with that gal you’ve had your eye on.

Attractic #1: Wear red
Attractic #2: Eat celery
Attractic #3: Play romantic music
Attractic #4: Order a chocolate dessert
Attractic #5: Learn some dance moves

Enhanced by Zemanta